Survivor: Vanuatu episode 3 recap

Eliza, good job. We finally learned your name this episode. Unfortunately, it is now associated with all things wishy-washy. What were you thinking? I don't know if the producers told you this, but there ARE cameras recording you every move. How can you sit with the anti-Dolly coalition and try to beg for someone's trust, then go to the pro-Dolly faction, and do the same thing, WITH EVERYONE WATCHING YOU. You were one step short of offering carnal pleasures for that immunity necklace (Jon, I was rooting for you), and quite frankly, it would have changed the meaning of "reward" challenge for a lot of the guys watching.

Twila, you also had a moment. It seemed like you had atoned for past discretions with the "young 'ens" (the "sorority girls"sounds much better; leave it the redneck to create a label that sticks). Again, amazing similarity, not only in physique, but in attitude to Alicia from Survivors past. Very interesting. Has Alicia gone through surgical procedures to fool the producers and try yet again for the prize? All I can say is if you do let the younger girls braid your hair, you will look even more like Alicia. Bad idea.

Sarge, you have disappointed me. Rory, or "Royry" as he is affectionately known by the phonetically challenged, is a lump of crap. A bitching, moaning, Vitamin-C gathering lump of crap. "Wow, fruit. Thanks, Rory. Um, could you show me where you got these before tribal council? Oh, no reason in particular. Thanks buddy." And then the hammer fell. J.P. Young, vibrate, creepy looking in the face, he felt the wrath of an alliance scorned. Sarge took it personal that J.P. would threaten a member of his alliance, the "9 legs" as I like to call them (think about it). Why in the ever living hell would you want to get rid of the guy who's not a pile of human feces? I don't know all the rules, but are you allowed to bring common sense as a luxury item? ZING!!!

Amy, nice boobs, and by boobs I mean immunity necklace, and by nice I mean I like the way your chest looks.

I guess that's it for this week. Tune in next week where:
1) Twila will have corn-rows
2) Rory will bitch about something on his way to get his torch snuffed
3) Eliza will side with a hermit crab over Scout and cause more mayhem
4) Sarge yells during a challenge, again
5) Somebody's T-shirt will fit a little tight (giggle, giggle) and I hope it's Bubba